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How to Forgive from the Heart

Just about everyone agrees that we should forgive. But how can one truly forgive? And how can one forgive from the heart?

That was the topic of my recent sermon, « Forgiveness. » Watch or listen below, scroll down for the sermon notes. God bless!


Just about everyone agrees that we should forgive — but how can we do that?

Consequences of Unforgiveness:

Breakdown in relationships


Health consequences

Emotional consequences

Mental consequences

Spiritual consequences

Physical consequences

Forgiveness is NOT being a “door-mat”

Restoring trust

Giving a second chance

Giving harmful people access to your heart, family, etc.

Keeping someone’s secret

Letting the guilty walk free

Giving harmful people permission to harm people

Enabling sin

Minimizing your pain or their sin

Forgiveness is not being an “emotional dictator”

Forcing someone to forgive

Confronting someone with your pain

Demanding people enable your sin, and tolerate your presence 

What is Forgiveness?

Forgiveness is internal 

It takes only one person

Forgiveness does not negate boundaries, justice, and “doing the right thing”: in fact, it enables us to do just that

Forgiveness is the internal, personal decision to release my right to “make you pay.”

How Can I Forgive?

List the person, and the action

List a minimum of three pain words

Pray, “I choose to forgive X for doing Y, causing me to feel Y…”

Pray, “I am willing to pay for the emotional pain and consequences that X has caused me…”

Pray, “Lord, please take back the ground I gave to the enemy through bitterness, and I yield that ground to your control”

Where Can I Forgive?

Caring for the Heart/Coeur à coeur Ministries //  

With a pastor/mentor/friend

Alone, in a quiet time with Jesus

Silently, throughout the day

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